Tuesday, November 11, 2008

would you could you with a mouse?

I hear a mouse in my walls. I think it's trying to chew its way through the drywall next to my dryer, because Lane and I sealed this place up good and tight from the inside (Dad and Justin H. sealed it up from the outside via the crawl space) with expanding foam. The few crackers I've left around to test for the presence of critters have gone untouched, which leads me to think it can smell the food and cannot reach it yet.

But I still hear it. It drives me nuts, knowing it's there, knowing that my neighbors' crawl spaces are NOT good and tight, and knowing that there are monsters in my crawl space, preventing me from going down and setting the poison and traps myself. I bought all this lethal stuff two weeks ago, in addition to a big flashlight (doubles as a club!), but cannot bring myself to actually enter my crawl space. Because of the monsters.

Now, I'm a pretty rational person. Stop laughing. I AM TOO. But in the middle of lakes or the ocean - and in crawl spaces - live monsters of a nefarious sort. I cannot describe them, but they are the same things I feared sitting on a porta-potty as a child. Heaven only knows what can grab you from depths you can't bring yourself to look in, much less see anything in if you tried. I've had two folks respond very sympathetically to this wildly irrational fear (one was Rob, the other Kellie), telling me that if they were there, they'd go in my crawl space for me.

On the one hand, I would see them as rescuers. Heroes of a noble and truly valiant sort.

On the other hand, I'm scared that I would never see them again.

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