Monday, October 27, 2008

you had it coming

I met Rob on the Thursday before J.R. & Molly's wedding. He seemed nice, but we didn't really interact at all. This is after both the bride and groom had spent a few weeks teasing me about how they were going to hook us up. He was evidently the only single guy invited to or involved with the wedding, therefore, we were going to be thrown at one another's heads. Molly did give me an aside though, telling me she was joking. Not only did she love me too much to play matchmaker, she thought that Rob and I would laugh a lot and get along well, but that was it. All my fears allayed, I was interested to meet him, but didn't think too much about it.

The next day, he came to the BBQ I threw for the happy couple at my folks' place. He was a sneaky one, going in for a hug when I tried to shake his hand, looking at me when I spoke... that sort of thing. He fiddled with his camera while my friend Kellie and I discussed our planned double wedding (she has since added "Greek" to that, despite both of us being of German/English descent), so he'll forever know her as "double wedding Kellie." He took a quick opportunity to try out a line on me: "If you were a pirate, would your wear your parrot on this shoulder (putting a hand on the one closest to him), or on THIS shoulder (putting his arm around me)." I laughed, so I guess it worked!

Now, I'm not really comfortable in front of a camera, preferring to be behind it. The idea that someone was videotaping the rehearsal and all the preparations was a little unnerving, and my knee-jerk response was to flip off the camera. A lot. Sensing the opportunity to tease me, Rob aimed the camera at me. A lot. Evidently, he wasn't recording every time, but J.R. and Molly may have lots of B-roll of my middle finger. Oops! By the rehearsal dinner, I figured I needed to show him his attention wasn't unwelcome. The next time I saw him aim his camera at me (no one else was looking), I winked and licked my lips.

He sat next to me at dinner.

After dinner, a family friend caught me on my way to the bathroom and asked, mock sternly, what was going on? He'd seen our legs touching, ever so slightly, under the table. Horrified (and slightly ticked - I hate the feeling of being watched), I smiled at him and told him with a wink that I had no idea what he was talking about. When Rob asked me to go for a little walk, I told him that I'd be happy to, but that I was being watched, so we'd need to do it on the sly. It was just starting to get dark, so going up the hill behind the house was still pretty easy. We found a large rock, climbed up, and started talking. And talking. And talking. I'm sure you can all imagine that I might have been doing most of that... but he was asking questions! He asked about all kinds of things: what I liked to read, how I like to sleep, about big Blake, about little Blake, and more.

He kept agreeing with what I was saying, which I thought was awfully convenient (how could I confirm that we did, in fact, have that much in common?), and when I got to ask some questions, one of the first things I learned was that he is a dual citizen of the U.S. and Canada. Now THAT freaked me out. Big Blake was a dual citizen. I mostly didn't believe Rob, but it turns out he has a Canadian flag tattoo on his back that was pretty good confirmation. As Reese asked, "What's with YOU and Canadians?"

We spent over two hours up there, talking, laughing, moving closer and closer. Finally, Rob asked for permission to kiss me, which I told him I would like very much. I didn't get home that night until 1:00, leaving after everyone else had gone; I found out that J.R. was feeling a bit freaked by Rob's and my interest in one another (and protective of me!), and knew I was going to be feeling rather shy the next day. Still, I was surprised by and enjoying my sincere affection for someone I'd only just met... everything felt very natural and right, except that part about being watched.

Guess God is still in the "answering prayers" business. I'm sorry I ever doubted Him!

Friday, October 24, 2008

that's what he said

B: That's a radio tower.
A: That's right! Good job with identification.
B: Radio towers are really shrunky.
A: Shrunky?
B: Yeah, that's what I call them. Shrunky. And... we're in Bozeman.
If I eat all my carrots, then I get a fruit leather because I'm being a really good eater. (Note: this is after half an apple AND a graham cracker. He really is a good eater!)
Also, today he got to play with Lizabeth (thanks, Becca!), whom he calls "Lizaboo." Always. Not because he doesn't know her name, but because that's what auntie Reese calls her. They were playing some make-believe where they'd both lie down on the jungle gym, then Blake would call out for Grammie Gee, Lizabeth would jump up and say "Day and night!" in her tiny little voice, and they'd jump up and run around for a little bit before doing it all over again.
After taking a picture of big Blake's cousin and friend, then looking at the viewfinder on my camera:
"Oh! So cute!"
Blake's started changing up words for funsies. Most often, he drops the last letter of a word and adds a "ck." Usually, this just makes him hard to understand, but the last time Rob was here, Blake amended the word "car" and kept repeating it.

"Mom, I get into the cock all by myself. That's silly! Cock. Cock. Cock."

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

because i like posting sixty times in one day

Disclaimer: both videos were shot on older model digital cameras. The quality is not great, but the scenes themselves are rather awesome.

Circa summer 2003: A bunch of friends went to Molly's folks' cabin in the Crazies. It's crazy windy in the Crazies. The mad jumper in green is David, and even though there's no sound, I love that you can still tell it's David.

I was remembering how Blake did this back in the day, and here's proof: he held his thighs when he first learned to walk. That puts this video somewhere between December/January of 2005/2006. It's at the Harvard house (where I also learned to walk), Mom is the one laughing in the background, Hannah is the one guessing why he does it, and I am the one with the extra-loud baby talk. I don't charge extra for that, unless you are over the age of five. Then you can't afford my baby talk.


On a whim, I tried on a few pants I've been hanging onto for, oh, over a year now (reality: 2.5). One even still had the tags on. I've been holding out hope that, one day, I will be motivated enough to actually be able to shoehorn myself back into these babies. There are three pair in particular, two from pre-pregnancy, and these aren't even my skinny jeans (those are from my honeymoon).


These are GAP Long & Leans, size 8. I've been a solid 10 for over three years now (prego doesn't count), and have been firmly and comfortably in denial about changing my body (any day now!), which is why I still own them.


Yes, I have a little muffin top, but I'm still working on that. The fact that I managed to trim some of the inches off my rear to get them over my hips is what's remarkable. So I decided to really push the limit and pulled out my skinny jeans (American Eagle, size 10).


Except it's now clear that, during my honeymoon, I wore jeans that were cute in the butt but laughably short in the leg. I've held onto them this long because I was so focused on the waistline that I didn't realize I would look like I'd gone digging for clams, and being unable to squeeze into them meant I had no idea how short they really were. Still,


Girls everywhere know what a big deal this is, and they are either cheering for me or cursing me in envy.


that's what he said

To Reese, while having lunch today:
B: "Your boobs are big. When you eat lots of food, your boobs get really bigger, like my mom's are bigger."
A: "I don't think that's how it works."
B: "Well, when you eat too many food, your head gets bigger. Like Reese's."
R: "Then I think you're the one that's eating too much. You have a big head."
B: "Yep, it's all right here." (tipping his head back and pointing to his throat)
A: "Do you need to poop?"
B: (anxious face, bowlegged tiptoeing)
A: "Then RUN! Run run run!"
B: (panicked wailing) "I can't run; it makes it come out!"
B: "Have you seen Batman*?
Whomever he's asked answers yes or no, then asks if he's seen it.
B: "I haven't seen Batman because it's a little too scary for me."

*Also Spiderman, The Incredible Hulk, or Superman

B: "Mom, after we finish our dinner, can we have dessert?"
A: "I think that sounds fair."
B: (eyes wide) "Mom! That's a bad word."

I've told him that "fair" will get him no where in this house, and that I consider it a bad word. It has four letters, after all. He's told me all kinds of things won't be fair to him or fair to God, and I usually counter with "The fair only comes once a year. And that's a bad word, please don't say it." Apparently I can't say it now either, though it's in completely different context!

Kids are so LITERAL.

just a note

Please pray for Rob and I as we explore the possibility of him moving here, specifically for wisdom in the work situation and how to best make sure that he is employed and with a good plan set up for both of our peace of mind. If this is God's will, we're asking that everything would be clear, the way paved, and that things would fall into place. If it's not, we're asking that He quickly shut the door of opportunity. Specifics:
  • Employment (we're working on this now, and things look promising)
  • Affordable living
  • Wisdom in the details
Thanks friends! I'm going to go back and start writing about how this all got started... now that he and I are in a more established place, I don't mind letting you all in on things. I'm not sure when I'll get to it, and I still want to write about Billings and him meeting my family, but hopefully it will make you all smile and laugh and roll your eyes at how ridiculous I can make myself.

Monday, October 20, 2008

easy there, mater

Call off the hounds! The friends who expressed the tiniest bit of hesitation over my kissing pictures are still very much okay in my book. Please do not malign them - I know their hearts are in the best place, and I just want to be sensitive to them while being true to myself.

I'm sure lots of folks are uncomfortable with my taste in humor or in blue language, and while I want to be sensitive to that too, well, sod off.
It's so charming how a garbage pail full of urine-filled Pull-Ups can make my whole house smell like an uncleaned hamster cage.

And by charming, I mean revolting.
Happy birthday, Reese! I forgot to mention Lane's on here (it was the 14th), but I can only remember so much these days. We're on the way out to drop off Reese's prezzie.

Saturday, October 18, 2008


Me and one other friend (that I know of) were shocked and somewhat amused by the fact that my friend Jody used the term "cold-hearted bitch." Yes, she was repeating my words, but this is JODY. She just doesn't use language like that. I can only assume that I have succeeded in corrupting her, despite not seeing her nearly enough.

She's so lucky to have me. Hi Jody!
For those curious, I have no plans to change the name of my blog any time soon, despite the apparent dissolution of my cynical side as I convert to full-on softie... but we'll see.
Apparently more than one person isn't entirely comfortable with my one kissing photo. I'm not sure why, so I'm not sure how to address it. Are they pretending to be uptight? That word does NOT describe these folks. Are they affected by seeing me kiss someone other than big Blake, whom they knew and loved? If so, I do want to be sensitive to that, but how? Just not post those particular photos that warm my heart and make me (and others) smile? I'm open to advice on this, and if you're not comfortable posting it in the comments section, please email me. This one is a head scratcher, and I'm navigating unknown waters!

Friday, October 17, 2008

loving right now

  • Balsamic reduction glaze. I was introduced to this delightful concoction in Calgary (thanks Erin & Dan!), and now I can't get enough. I drag cheese through it, or chips, crackers, bread, grapes, whatever. It's acidic enough that I can't eat very much at one go, but mmm, it is so yummers. And I'll bet my friend Nichole has a great version of it at her store.
  • Blake's ability to self-play, which has enabled me to stay in bed far longer than I should have twice this week, due to feeling under the weather. I set him up with PBS, a banana, and a sippy of milk, and he leaves me alone for an hour+.
  • PaperbackSwap. I've expanded my collection of great books through this site, costing me only the postage to send my own books out. I have yet to read most of them, but a free hardcover copy of The Black Stallion printed in the 1950s? How cool is that?!
  • Fabulous chicken soup with crusty bread and a friend over tonight. I hope I feel reenergized after the fresh and tasty soup (thanks Mom!).
  • The woman who kindly picked up after her dog pooped in front of my condo. She was a half-block away and calling the dog, so I stepped out and hollered (nicely) if she wouldn't mind coming down to clean up when she got a chance? Not only did she respond kindly (I really wasn't being rude, just assuming she didn't realize her dog had messed my yard), but she came down within five minutes and cleaned up the poo I'd seen, plus one pile I hadn't. I love good neighbors.
  • All the comments on how happy and non-cynical I look these days. I must warn you though: flattery will get you everywhere with me.


Rob likes taking pictures of himself about as much as I do. This doesn't bode well for all your curious eyes...

Blake, "playing" the Wii, while Thrall took a much-needed break from licking all the extremities on the small person that was just the right height for licking. With lots of licking.

See, now I LIKE this self-portrait.

It dumped snow on us immediately after we arrived in Billings, so Rob took Blake out to do his favorite thing: shovel. The snow ended up keeping us in Billings one extra day, and Billings got more than Bozeman, which is weird.

Blake returned the favor by letting Rob watch Transformers with him.

"You're funny."
"No, YOU'RE funny."
And everyone around us barfed.

Molly grabbed my camera and snapped a few shots, then commented on how lucky she is with HER camera. Now I'm wondering what it would take to upgrade. I was perfectly happy with it before! Molly, you are naughty. I hope J.R. appreciates it.

Rob & J.R. are friends from college, and watching them together was pretty entertaining. They did shots, talked technology, mocked me... it was great.

Mom tried to get a closeup head shot of Blake (to match the ones Reese gave her of the twins), but handed him a bag full of Muddy Buddies first. He was mildly interested in the photo shoot, but VERY interested in the Muddy Buddies.

So I helped clean him off. A close up would show all the chocolatey goodness surrounding his mouth, and we just couldn't have that.

Grammie & me, trying to the perfect shot. I don't know what's on her camera, but I'm emailing her this, in the hopes it's close to what she wanted:

Thursday, October 16, 2008

it's a start

I'm not sure how many of you know this, but I went to Spokane early this month.

Yep, I did. Spent some time with a fella there too. He's pleasant to be around, so I might go back eventually... or in precisely fifteen days.

We got there with numb butts, ready to do something (anything!) besides sit in the car. Rob helpfully bundled us back into the car and took us to Riverfront Park in downtown Spokane, which turned out to be worth it. We walked by the river, Blake chased the geese ("I going to just pet one, Mom."), we played in the water fountain/feature/thingy and got all wet, Blake went round and round down the enormous Radio Flyer wagon/slide, and Blake and I rode the carousel. Rob said my grin was bigger than Blake's the whole time, but it was because I was watching my child experience something new and fun and different, all while keeping a death grip on the bar so as not to slide off the very tall horsey. He couldn't decide whether he should be delighted or anxious, but he firmly told me that I needed to hold on with BOTH hands when I leaned back, with one hand in the air, and said "Yee-haw!"

Rob, I am not a cowgirl, but I speak the language... just like you, but with you, it's Jedi knight.

We met Rob's sister Rachel and her family, Chris & Jasmine, and Blake and Jasmine hit it off right away, despite a six-year age gap. They were rather hilarious together, and Jasmine gamely endured shooting and being shot at over and over again. She also tried to teach him some stuff on the Wii, but that was less successful due to Blake's lousy hand-eye coordination. I was tickled by the built-in entertainment, which allowed me to pay attention to, er, other things. Plus, I didn't have a bored three-year-old hanging off me or underfoot at every moment, which was unexpected. He still misses her, because I am not nearly as fun no matter how hard I try. Also, no Wii!

I got to help make dinner for Rob's folks, Cec and Joyce, and I think Blake won them over for us. It was easy really: set him and Jasmine loose in the living and watch what happens. I barely had to make conversation, but when we did, it was fun and easy and relaxed. However, I learned that Rob doesn't like sour cream, which is, unfortunately, a strike against him. I suppose I can't have it all.

It was a pleasant, easy-going weekend, and I really enjoyed just getting to be in the same room as this man that I've fallen for so thoroughly. I learned more about a few things that we'll get to address in the coming weeks and months, but nothing like a red flag-type deal breaker. If anything, I'm more resolved in my fondness for him and desire to see where God takes us. And yes, he told me that he loved me, and in such a way that melted my heart and my firm resolve to hold him at arm's length.

It didn't help that he was hugging me at the time. What can I say? He's bigger and stronger, and it's tricky holding someone at arm's length when your arms are wrapped around them. Firmly.

Though we've decided not to make any big decisions until after Christmas (which I think is wise in many ways), including if either of us will move, Rob kept trying to convince me of the attractiveness of Spokane, starting every argument with "Six ski resorts within an hour and..." Because anyone who knows me knows I'm a total powder hound. I think - maybe - he's making fun of me? He did win at our first game of Scrabble, but it's awesome to have a challenge and really get my game face on. Also, I take some small, nerdy comfort knowing that I kick his ass when it comes to doing a crossword puzzle.

Then I put away my reading glasses, sip my Metamucil, and go to bed at 8:00 pm.

The drive back was harder than I'd imagined, because I very much did not want to leave. I was torn between hating the idea of driving in the dark and hating the idea of driving away, so we didn't get back until 9:30 in the evening (rather dark), and I still managed to have a two-hour conversation with him that night. Turns out I am an emotional sap, not the cold-hearted bitch I'd have you all believe. I hope that doesn't let you down TOO much.

(Side note: only two cuss words in this post! He's making me a better woman already.)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

madly curious

Who is in Owosso, Michigan?

i'm coming, i'm coming

Blogger just finally let me on this evening, but it's late enough that I honestly couldn't do justice to my time in Spokane or Rob's time here (now we're even!), which are my next two posts.

So I'll fill you in on this week. I have four dates with four good friends (none at the same time - apparently I like to keep my friends to myself?), and a fifth with a couple. Brian will take Blake, and I will give Beth a pedicure. She's about eleven months pregnant and can barely see her toes, much less reach them, so I'm pitching in. I'm making two batches of chokecherry jelly tomorrow because I just have to get these things out of my freezer. I'm also exercising after about two weeks off. I'm hoping to reclaim a little of my sanity and rest, to make at least two decent dinners, to get caught up on all the water I haven't been drinking, to watch a movie, and to finish a few magazines (dare I hope to touch a book?).

I got to see three movies this weekend. One was good (What Happens in Vegas) and rather funny. One was very good (Iron Man) and unexpectedly funny. One was excellent (Run Fatboy Run) and made me cry, I laughed so hard. I have now done this twice in front of Rob (laughed 'til I cried), so I don't think he understands how rare that is. Also, all of the above are pretty clean, so I could recommend them all to my mother. That NEVER happens, and my parents have lost all faith in my taste in movies after watching the following on my recommendation:
I'm sure there are more, but those are the ones that come to mind. I will note, however, that despite my father despising Adam Sandler, he did like Spanglish (because everyone does the right thing). I'm not sure what to say... I have erratic (awesome) taste in movies?

Wednesday, October 8, 2008


Anyone else find all the clutter folks slap all over their blogs or their Facebook pages distracting? It's like the digital version of Precious Moments dolls covering the flat surfaces of your home. I dislike clutter in general, but I've always been especially nonplussed by Precious Moments... and the quickest way to dismiss a fella in the past has been to tell my friends that he's the kind of guy who, in a fit of what he would deem romantic inspiration, would buy me a PM doll.

I'm sorry: collectible.

We'd all laugh, sigh, and agree that I'd eat him alive. Rob, you might want to write this down!
I've been so encouraged in so many ways, not least of which is the correspondence I've begun with one of Rob's sisters. The other is rather busy, so I'm not hurt AT ALL that the only email I've gotten from her is one asking what my intentions were with her brother - tongue firmly in cheek. I told her I planned to beat him in Scrabble and apparently won her over completely.

The sister I write more regularly seems like a kindred spirit, and I'm very excited to meet her over Christmas. She's had some amazingly encouraging things to say, and while Rob might be a bit nervous that she and I are getting along so handsomely (I think he's scared we'll gang up on him, which, of course we will), I'm having a great time getting to know her.

Also, she may have told Rob to keep me around because she really wants to play with Blake. SWEET! I wonder how she feels about potty-training.
I listen to the following podcasts, specifically when I'm cleaning house and Blake's asleep or during long drives and Blake's asleep:
I'm just that big a nerd, but TAL can be funny or thought-provoking or bittersweet. SS makes me feel better about how little I read anymore. WWDTM is a news quiz, but very funny and even informative - it balances out the Newsweek I devour weekly. TSP is a word game, and I love love love word games.
I just can't feel badly about my addiction to Project Runway.
I have approximately 15,000 words to use in a day (average woman is estimated at 7,000*). I'm seeing such a generous guy that he gives me over half of his daily allotment (average guy is estimated at 2,000)... and he stubbornly insists that I am not crazy. Also, I would like to point out that my overuse isn't even because I have to repeat everything to him because he listens to my prattle. What's not to love?

*This is in no way scientific, and the actual numbers varied wildly when I looked it up.

great expectations

Blakester and I got back from Spokane on Monday night. I know that many (all?) of my tens of readers want to know how that trip went, so I will naturally be blogging about my trip to Calgary today.

Mostly, I still have things to say about that trip, and I want to keep things straight in my head, so you will just have to check back later if you want the skinny on the "Rob-ber" of my heart. HAHA! Catherine made that up, and I just stole it. Thanks Catherine!

In mid-September, Blake and I went up to Calgary for a promised visit to see Grammie Gee and Grampa Kent, Aunt Ernie and Uncle Dan. This was the first time I'd attempted to make the drive myself, and I was a little apprehensive, largely due to the length. It's a solid 500 miles and seven to eight hours, and Blake's recently decided that potty-training is optional. We got to Helena and stopped for an early lunch, where I realized I'd left our passports at home in Bozeman.

I got a hold of Rob, who verified for me the new border-crossing requirements, put in place by our government, who has decided "give me your tired, your poor" no longer applies. Passports are not required when crossing by land until next year, so I didn't have to go back. Yippee! Still, I knew that getting OUT of the country wouldn't be hard, but they could easily hassle me when I tried to get back IN.

Got there in good time, no real melt-downs by either of us, and Margie's place was as lovely as I remembered, especially when surrounded by aspens in their full golden glory of fall. We hit the Zoo with Erin, and Blake did marvelously, walking to and fro and seeing a baby giraffe and baby elephant. Erin took me home, Margie took Blake, and we both were spoiled by our respective hosts. They went to Heritage Park, where Blake got to ride the Ferris wheel, the train, and the S.S. Moyie Sternwheeler.

Erin and Dan hosted a little dinner party with me and some friends, then we went to a pub a few blocks away for drinks and dancing to Dr. Zeuss, the cover band (surprisingly good!) that was playing that weekend. I even beat Dan at bubble hockey, while laughing my head off - never really played before, so I won strictly on luck. Their friend, Mike, knew just enough jitterbug to get me started, so I taught him a few more moves, and we had a blast practicing.

Erin and I got up for pedicures and wandering the shops on 4th Street (near their house), stopping for sushi and good conversation at lunch. I can't find tuna belly rolls anywhere here, but they are my new favorite. We talked about big Blake and how our hearts are doing and cried a little together. I fell down though: the timing was so perfect to pray with and for Erin, and I didn't. I was scared - I don't want to be pushy or alienating, even as I desperately want to introduce her (everyone!) to my Jesus. I regret that I was fearful and self-conscious at at time when Erin would doubtless have been receptive and warm, and my prayer is that I would not let such opportunities to slip by in the future.

I was so blessed by our time together. Erin and Dan are lovely people, and finally getting to know Erin on our own terms, in our own time, was huge for me. Also, she knows where all the good stores are in Calgary, so I am sporting some great new threads! We finished up the weekend with some very mellow time at Margie & Kent's place, where Dan beat me and Erin at Scrabble (I demand a rematch), and Blake got to hot tub, enjoy the horses, and create his own obstacle course from Margie's horse-jumping equipment.

It was lovely, though the slightly longer trip (five days, rather than three or four) showed me that I need my own laptop. There's something about borrowing someone else's that makes me feel like I'm invading their privacy, though I never really feel that way when someone uses my desktop. Weird. I didn't get any work done, which was good and bad - exceedingly relaxing, but I was fearful of what I would be hit with upon getting home.

Speaking of getting home, I was a bit nervous about the border. Big Blake had been hassled once, and they threatened to hold him at the border so I could drive all the way to Bozeman and back to get his passport, since we could not otherwise prove his citizenship (we couldn't prove mine either, but they believed me because I was born in Billings - the big strapping man next to me was an American born in Calgary, which apparently equals a threat). I get asked at every border crossing if little Blake's father knows he's leaving/entering the country, and I tell them that I'm widowed, they apologize, I hand them our passports, and we get waved through.

Still, I have NO proof of ANYTHING this time, and I'm creating scenarios in my mind about just beggging to be allowed to go home, asking why they'd hassle a poor widow and her cranky pre-schooler, trying to remember where they could go online to verify my sob story, etc. etc. We get to the border and a long line, and I set Blake in my lap to "help" me drive up to the checkpoint. It took a while, and he was antsy. We got through the main points: we're visiting in-laws, were there five days, we're headed to Bozeman, I'm a widow, we were both born in Billings, and no, I don't have proof of our citizenship.

A: "I'm sorry - I realized in Helena that I had forgotten our passports."
Border guard: "Well, why did you do that?" (he may have been joking, but I have a good ear for that, and that's not what I was picking up!)
A: "Um, (pointing to Blake) I was distracted as the single mother of a three-year-old. I can only be SO amazing."

He didn't think it was as funny as I did. Apparently his ear for a joke was not in as good shape as mine. Still, they let me through! We got to Great Falls and stopped to see Helenmarie, Margie's mom, at the McDonald's there. Double-Grammie HM got us ice cream cones, and Blake ran himself ragged in the play area while she and I got a bit caught up. Now, I don't know her that well, and I think the last time I saw her would have been for Blake's funeral (and her husband, Jim's, funeral before that), but it was SO GOOD.

First off, anyone who says as many sincerely kind things to me as she did is okay in my book! Second, her heart was clearly so soft that I couldn't help but love her and want to spend more time with her. Third, she was excited for my new relationship, and told me with tears in her eyes how often she's prayed for that for me and little B. Blake liked her too, and went right to her for a hug, which was dear and unusual. I hope to make more such stops in the future, as it was an unexpected and thorough blessing.

There. Whew! I'll publish more later (I have a Post-It on my desk with a list of blog items to touch on), but I'm not sure when... the rest of this week is going to be wildly crazy, but I'll do my best. It's funny how I feel a sense of responsibility not only to feed and clothe me and my boy, but also to keep those who love me enough to read this thing updated on the comings, goings, and thoughts of my life. It's like you all care about what I have to say.

Well, then... OKAY.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

there, i've said it

It's nice to be in love.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

counting down

400 miles / 80 mph (I speed) = 5 hours

That's only two movies (for Blake) and five podcasts (for me)! Easy peasy.


The 381 M BPL podcast upload finished. Apparently, the sixth time is the freakin' charm, for crying out loud.

what are my intentions?

Blake drew me a picture at preschool last week! He's such a nice boy. In the picture, he gave me lipstick, as in "hot lips," as in whenever I put on lipstick, he asks, "Mom, do you got hot lips? Can I feel them?" Then I give him a kiss. I swear I didn't teach that (lipstick = hot lips) to him - maybe my mother did?

He also gave me jeans and reddish hair. I'm serious... it's pretty good for a three-year-old, but I am admittedly biased. He is next to me, smaller, and all in black: arms, legs, head, etc. Below him is a black creature. The teacher helpfully labeled everything: Blake, Mom, my cat.

Excuse me?

I asked him what it was, and he explained:

B: "Mom, that's just our cat, Olive."
A: "We don't have a cat."
B: "I know. We need to go to kitty store to buy one. And we will name him Olive."
A: "Olive?"
B: "Yeah! You know, the little round black things on pizza? Olive! I love Olive."
The other day, Blake was busily not napping while I was busily working. At one point, I came into his room for what would be the last time ("If I have to come in here again because you are not sleeping, I will have to discipline you.") and saw his Pull-Up on the floor.

I whipped the covers back to see that he had a fresh one on, so I asked, ticked, why he had taken the first one off. Then I picked it up. It was VERY wet. Mollified (he'd put a new on one, after all), I told him that Pull-Ups do not belong on the floor.

A, still annoyed: "Blake, why did you take your Pull-Up off and leave it there? Pull-Ups belong in the garbage." (pointing to the lidded garbage in the corner)
B, slightly worried: "Well, I didn't want to put it in there because it makes noise and then you'd come in here."

Um, well, that's true. He's so smart, it scares me.
I have weird neighbors. The ones immediately west of me (we share the kitchen wall) keep their A/C running ALL THE TIME. They had it going in April, when there was snow on the ground. They have it going when it's 65 F outside. They have it going at night, when it gets nice and cool. I'm not sure what's going on - marijuana operations keep it warm, right? - but I'm wondering if they don't have a meat locker over there.

The neighbors across the street have a condo that MIGHT be 500 square feet more than mine. 1500 square feet, possibly. They have a Great Dane, and she's beautiful and huge. They just got a puppy, a black Lab, and from the looks of this pup's feet and head, they will have two 100+ pound dogs in 1500 square feet. The amount of poop alone makes me faint, and does anyone else think that scenario is CRAZY?
Joy: thank you for the accountability! I did a brief cardio routine today, did my weights on Monday, and hope to go on a good walk or two while in Spokane this weekend. So I'm on track... and I haven't had any ice cream this week. Woo hoo!
After three and a half weeks apart, I get to see Rob this weekend (Blake and I are going there). I'm practically levitating with anticipation and excitement, and the friends who've encountered me recently have noted a visible difference in my countenance. It is nice to be unabashedly happy.