Sunday, January 10, 2010

my face-washing friends

There's something about people laughing at my jokes that makes me funnier. I am convinced of this. If you roll your eyes or just patiently endure my mania, I calm right down and get less exuberant, more serious, more socially appropriate. You know... BORING.

Two former roomies and I got to go out together the other night (one lives far, far away, which is sad, but her being in town is an event to celebrate, so we do!), and while our living together was not always harmonious because that is how girls roll, our not living together and being grown-ups in three very different life situations makes for some great conversation. Sometimes it's achingly funny, sometimes it just aches - like life - but we always leave happier for our time together.

Also, now that they don't have to live with me, they choose not to rein in my crazy. The ensuing chaos (I am a loud laugher - did you know?) probably disrupts most of the people around us, but at least we keep the inappropriate parts of the conversation quiet for their sake (Right, K & J? I wasn't TOO loudly explicit?). I am so blessed and cheered to have women in my life who know me and like me anyway. Coming together to love on each other and deepen relationships is one of the joys of friendships - because we pull no punches. The three of us have each weathered some pretty shitty stuff, and we are brutally real about life with each other, even when it is less perfect than we'd like.

We are the face-washing friends. They get to see me without my makeup, without my hair styled, without my glossed over, fit to be seen in public veneer. Granted, they got to see that when they lived with me, when J taught me the expression "My eyes look like two pee-holes in a snowbank" upon seeing her bleary reflection in the wee hours of the morning, and when K and I had cats that would NOT get along. It was harder to be face-washing friends then, because they had to put up with me a LOT MORE. But now, the foundation has been laid, and we get to just jump right into each other's lives and love one another there. In the mud and the muck.

In the reality.

These are friends who come from afar for a wedding, a funeral, another wedding. These are friends I call at 1:00 a.m. with a devastated heart who drive right over to hear me weep and shake my fist at God. These are friends who cat-call me in church and make time for me whenever they can. These are friends who laugh at my jokes and make me feel witty, engaging, and loved. I am enormously fond of them as well.


Grammie Perrine said...

Oh,Addie,how I love the way you turn a phrase..."face-washing friends"... such a perfect description of pals who weather the storm with you... Thanks for gladdening my heart.

kfuhrman said...

I am enormously fond of you...just in case you didn't know! I have been so busy that I haven't hardly been on the computer lately. I was talking with J this morning and she asked if I'd read this post on you blog. I was sad to say no, but now I have read it and cried! I love you and am so grateful for your wonderful, hilarious, and sometimes jaw dropping insights into life. I totally need to pick it up on the workouts again too. I've been slacking the past week! Love ya!