I clogged the sink tonight. Nothing, not even holding my breath and using the plunger, would help.
Backing up thirty minutes...
I bought a bunch of food last week. Like, a ton. Fresh ingredients for all the great soups and pastas and whatever, large cuts of meat, blah blah blah.
For one reason or another, I have made exactly ONE of the five meals I had planned. Not that this is bad - while I love to cook, I also love not cooking while still being fed (that last part is key in enjoying the first part). Because Rob's in Missoula for some training today and tomorrow and Blake went to bed really early tonight, I have time on my hands. Do I go out with the girls? Crack open a bottle of wine and watch sappy movies? Have friends over for Super Mario Brothers marathons?
No. I cut up large quantities of fresh celery, broccoli, and carrots in order to freeze them so that I might easily use them at a later date rather than watch in vain as they spoil at the bottom of my fridge. Wheee! I think this means I am thoroughly domesticated.
After shoving all the carrot peels down the disposal, I turned away for bit, then looked back to realize that while the disposal was merrily churning away, the water wasn't going anywhere. In fact, the water that was running was simply bringing the level of the sink up higher...
I turned everything off and stuck my hand down there, but the disposal was practically empty. It was just whipping up a froth of carrot-colored dishwater. I ran water down the other side of the sink, and it drained readily, so I knew exactly where the clog was: in the straight piece of pipe connecting the disposal to the main pipe.
I also know how to loosen and tighten those nifty little plastic fittings on the pipes under the sink.
So I loosened them. But before you envision orange-carrot-water disaster all over under my sink, know this: I had on rubber gloves. I removed EVERYTHING from underneath that sink and set a mop bucket below the curve (pee trap?) I was about to remove. And then I got to loosening. Pulled off one part, and the clog wasn't present. Wiggled the straight part free to the point that I saw chopped up carrot peels. AHA! I grabbed a butter knife and starting poking and pulling.
The gush that was suddenly freed may have splashed a bit, but my mop bucket is tall, and lo, I was protected. Also, did I mention the rubber gloves?
Got everything nasty (NASTY) in the bucket, reattached all the pipes, cautiously ran the water down both drains to make sure the pipes were secure, and put my life back together.
I probably saved us about $200 by not needing to call the plumber. I may have washed my hands fifteen times since getting done (rubber gloves aren't MAGIC), but I feel kind of bad-ass. Sure, all I did was show basic "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey" knowledge, but I am a semi-prim girl who did plumbery things and I think that counts for something, so I celebrated...
with a cup of hot tea. WATCH OUT WORLD! I'm getting wild.