grateful for... cute hats and good friends

I took yesterday off. Actually, I was busybusybusy all day with family, which was lovely and is a post for another day of gratitude. I love my family... they are so great.

November 12 and 13

Today I am grateful for the cute hat seen in this photo. I get complimented on it EVERY TIME I wear it, which, because I get complimented on it, is quite often, as you may imagine. I even wore it to church today, like a heathen, and was complimented twice. Holy people are not always immune to flattery or vanity, thank goodness.

I am also grateful for the dear friend seen in this photo. She came over and we had tea and played Go Fish (twice!) and Candy Land with a certain little mohawk man, and then we sat cozily on the couch and talked about important things and not important things and Kleenex was used and we shared a blanket and it was very good. She and I go way back to when she was my teaching assistant when I took a sign language class. We had mutual friends and enjoyed each other, but her moving back to Bozeman after years spent elsewhere has fostered a kinship I hadn't imagined back when I was a self-involved narcissist in college (some of you may claim that not much has changed given the second paragraph of this post, but I guess it's my story and I'll tell it with whatever slant I want!). She's one of my favorite people, and she accessorizes the hat so nicely in the photo she masterfully took.

grateful for... tiny oranges

November 11

Today I am grateful for a few things, not least of which is a new friend volunteering to watch Blake while I ran errands, then refusing to take money for the hour or so she played vigorously with my son. During my time out, I grabbed a bag of satsumas, having recently discovered that the tart acidity helps to soothe my tummy. Then I saw a bag of potstickers and grabbed them too.

Are those Eggos in that Costco-sized box? No? Kirkland brand waffles? GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!

Then I beat a hasty retreat before more of the store found its way into my cart. Though I usually enjoy Costco samples, I had to hold my breath and hustle past them today.

I'm about to enjoy an orange now (third today! tummy soothed AND I will be quite regular!), along with a cup of tea and either something on the telly or a crossword.

grateful for... helping hands

November 10

I was only half-joking when I asked Rob if we should just delay cleaning for a whole month so we could do one last thorough job when we moved. His enthusiastic response was alarming enough that I promptly cleaned one of the toilets last night. By promptly, I mean I sprayed it down with cleaner at 5:00 and forgot about it until I headed for bed at 11:30 (stupid, I know, I'm trying to break the late night habit). Cleaning a toilet at midnight isn't high on my list of things to do, mostly because cleaning toilets is already pretty darn low on that list.

Today, the same man who would cheerfully live in filth if I let him (I think - we haven't tested the theory since getting married), cheerfully helped me clear the floors, then swept them himself, then mopped them, while I moved furniture back into place and vacuumed. It may have to do with the fact that I lovingly called him the "Mop Master," or perhaps with the fact that I have a habit of touching him inappropriately when asking him to do unpleasant tasks, or maybe with the fact that he daily sees my pathetic attempt at life in the first trimester and took pity on my sorry little act.

Whatever the motivation, a chore that I absolutely despise took no time at all, and even though it's far too cold to pad around barefoot, I know that if I did, my feet wouldn't find the grit of all the random debris that had accumulated since the last time we took care of the floors. He may refuse to clean toilets point blank and unapologetically, but he helps me elsewhere, and it warmed my hard little nauseous heart today.

grateful for... marilla

November 9

Today I am grateful for the ultrasound that confirmed our little tiny baby is still going strong, making us 9 weeks and 4 days along, with a due date in early June. Remember back when I posted about not being pregnant and being okay with that because of the time it gave me? Yeah, that was written just after a pregnancy test that turned out to be a false negative. Ten days later, it was very, very positive, and I entered the wonderfully nervous world of "Please let this one take!"

I started calling her "Marilla," much to Rob's chagrin, speaking in faith and prophecy that the little girl Lane is having will usher in a wave of baby girls for me and my sisters. Because it's about time we had a break from all those penises (husbands, I don't mean you...).

We've now had two ultrasounds - one at a crisis pregnancy center after I assured them it was no crisis - and one today, after the doctor couldn't find the heartbeat externally (he wasn't worried at all - it was quite early - but it made me anxious) and wasn't confident that my dating for the gestational age was accurate (because of the weird things my body did in the three cycles after the miscarriage, not because I'm an idiot).

Rob promptly texted his family, declaring "We have a live one! 150 beats per second!" which would mean we are having not a baby, but a hummingbird on cocaine. I will love her and squeeze her and pet her and call her Marilla... at least until she actually gets here.

grateful for... better living through chemistry

November 8

Today I am grateful for ibuprofen. A better night of sleep last night was lovely, but somehow I was left with a tender left temple that had me stretched on the couch with my eyes closed all morning. So today I am thankful for drugs to help alleviate such things, and a delicious chai brought by my sister with her dear youngest monkey.

grateful for... being appreciated

November 7

R: You're pretty.
A: Thank you! I don't feel particularly so today. I'm kind of a wreck.
R: Well, your hair looks nice and polished, your make-up is artfully done...
A: (bewildered look) Uh...
R: (getting closer) Or fabulously minimal.
A: Yeah, it's just mascara and powder.
R: Well, it's like I've said, I'm consistently surprised at what a looker I got to marry. I still can't believe I got a pretty one that's smart too. Though sometimes I'm not so sure that "smart" is all that great. You got a mouth on you.
A: I love you too.

grateful for... sunday afternoons

November 6

I took a 2.5-hour nap. I had some strange dreams, but it was restful, which is what I needed. Blake and I capped that off by watching the Pixar Short Films marathon on ABC Family. I love light-hearted things that make him laugh that hard. I read a few chapters of a book that is good and thought-provoking and tender, but only a few. The writer is a poet, and I find such language contrived and too self-aware (yes, I realize that's a bit hypocritical coming from the writer of this self-indulgent navel-gazing).

I'll polish off my Sunday afternoon with a Sunday evening, working on a sewing project and drinking hot tea to calm my unhappy tummy/body. It's been a pretty decent day, all told.

grateful for... someone to keep me young

November 5

This guy right here:

grateful for... an involved teacher

November 4

Today I am especially grateful for a teacher who saw a need in my son and met it. Apparently his impulse control isn't what it could be, despite having fairly strict parents and having already been through years of preschool and a year of kindergarten. He was regularly getting in trouble at school for talking out of turn, distracting other students, and being a bit too hands-on with his friends. We're a physical family, so I understand part of that, but where he got the idea that pushing a good friend's head into the drinking fountain was funny is beyond me.

So Mrs. B instituted a behavior chart. There are five specific areas where he can act out and get a check mark for it, and if he gets five marks in one day, it's an automatic parent/teacher conference. The chart comes home with him every day, and so that he'd understand our influence and authority extends all the way to school, he has specific consequences for each mark, and specific consequences for no marks (he usually picks Wii time). A mark-free week has yet to happen, but we're close, and I'm thinking a small Lego may be in order to show him that we really value his good behavior. It's also dangerously close to a bribe, but it just so clearly illustrates that good comes from good, so maybe I don't care!

Having a teacher on it enough to give him a warning and a simple mark makes things easier for her, I'm sure. It shows him exactly what he was doing that was not okay, and it gives him things to work towards (she's a fan of special stickers for good behavior). Rob and I can encourage him to obey in more specific ways, and I know what's going on when he's out of my range of vision.

And the best part (to me, at least)? I just heard from Margie, big Blake's mom, that HE had a behavior chart too, and once he realized that disobedience at school was known about at home, he whipped it together right quick. I love knowing that about the child, because the man was so stinkin' self-disciplined that it almost wasn't real!

grateful for... carnal relations

November 3

Now, bear with me. This is a PG-13 rated post simply because it acknowledges the existence of sex.

I'm really grateful for intimacy with my husband. We had a moment recently where he asked, "Why don't they show THIS in the movies?!" while we both laughed. Needless to say, it wasn't a particularly "sexy" moment, but it was deeply intimate and funny and dear. If you're not laughing when making love to your spouse (and for the record, kids, that's the ONLY sex I advocate: intimacy within the covenental bounds of marriage), you're doing it wrong.

Not to say we're yucking it up the whole time, but the movies do young folks a grave disservice in how they portray the jubilant fun and relationship of sex. It can be bumpy, awkward, and incredibly silly-feeling at first. And as you grow to know and love your spouse, the one committed to you in sickness and in health, you grow less self-conscious about that love handle or stretch mark. A healthy marriage includes a healthy sex life, and both are incredibly safe. You can experiment and know that if things go wildly awry, you'll collapse into a fit of giggles and have fun the entire time. You can enjoy one another, in all the glory and foolishness that accompany the human bodies, just as God intended.

Sex is supposed to be spiritual. That's how it connects you. It's supposed to be fun. And I am really grateful that even when we're not having much of it for one reason or another, Rob and I love it when we do. I truly praise God that He created sex and created us one for the other.