context is everything

(from Bunko night)
R: How big is it?
A: I'm going to need some context here.
*
A: (after an inadvertent brush) Hey! Watch my boobs! (the entire table stopped to obey)
*
N: I don't have to see it. I trust that it's there.
A: I'm going to take that out of context and put it on my blog.

(I'm becoming "that girl." The one people have to watch what they say around because they know I'll put it on the internet. As if MY internet presence wasn't embarrassing enough. Now I'm adding you!)

*****
BB: I've got a frequent licker's card.
(laughter)
I DO! That's what it's called!
A: That doesn't make it right!

*****
BB: Keep fondling it. That's cool.
A: I love taking things out of context. You sound really dirty.

*****
B: Dad, look at the truck I made! Here's the windshield, here's the engine, and here's the back where all the people are.
R: Oh, it's the perfect border crossing vehicle. Are you running Mexicans?
B: Sure!

*****
B: Mom, I had a wet dream.
A: WHAT?! I mean... what's a wet dream?
B: Well, you know, a dream where I peed my pants.
A: Oh. (with relief) That will mean... something... else... when you get older. (hands pressed to face)
B: Yeah, and then I'll get bigger and have a wet dream.
A: (groan)