excerpt from an email

Sent 4/5 to Mom and Molly:
Blake wasn't necessarily being naughty when he messed his pants earlier. Based on the state of our bathroom, I can authoritatively declare that the sounds of distress were due to the fact that every toot was in fact very bad diarrhea. And because he thought they were toots, he was not on the toilet at the time, though his pants were down, leading to FURTHER distress, leading to some sad little attempts to clean up before I came in and brought the thunder. Poor guy. He was scared until I walked in the door, took his face gently in my hands, explained that his bottom was sick, and he was not in trouble. And now I have to disinfect damn near everything two feet and lower. And do lots of laundry in VERY hot water.

I love you two. You both were talking to me either about this or while this was happening, so I had to share. Also, I will be blogging about it. Eventually. Because if I can't provide birth control to my readers, who will?!

*****
This has happened three times now (the part about having major sharts with the pants down). The good news is that it's always on a hard surface or a throw rug that I can toss in the laundry. The bad news is that I think it's nerves about the wedding - he didn't do it at preschool yesterday. My child is possibly more worked up about this event than I am, poor thing.

However, the second these same nerves hit Rob, I am officially running away...

to buy matches and more Lysol.